“I Was Born Suspicious” - RFK Jr Sticker

Stick this on your bumper, your water bottle, or the back of a pharmaceutical rep’s laptop. This kiss-cut crusader features my baby self in a full suit, staring into your soul and gently questioning your life choices. I might be the size of a Build-A-Bear, but I’ve got questions—and they start with, “Who authorized this juice box?”

This isn’t just a sticker. It’s a statement. A warning label. A glossy little piece of parental concern wrapped in toddler rage.

Product Features:

• Kiss-cut design for easy peel-and-stick activism

• Weatherproof vinyl, because I don’t melt under pressure (or media scrutiny)

• Glossy finish so bright it outshines my podcast lighting

• One size fits all — just like my campaign platform (sort of)

• Slap it on your laptop, water bottle, or your enemy’s Subaru

Care Instructions:
Wipe with a damp cloth—no bleach, no toxins, and absolutely no government overreach.