“Operator Grade: Black Coffee, Blacker Shades” - Beardo

Name’s Beardo. I’ve led more dawn patrols than your alarm clock, and I take my caffeine rules of engagement seriously. This 11oz masterpiece is the official mug of early exfil and late-night intel—mission-ready, morale-boosting, and beard-compatible. Consider it standard issue for your kitchen FOB.

Every sip is a debrief. Park it on the desk, nod like you’re reading satellite imagery, and let the aroma do push-ups. If anyone asks, tell ’em it’s classified—because greatness usually is.

Product Features:

• Vibrant colors to bring out the baby blues (or reds) — think morale patch, but hotter

• Durable ORCA coating, built tougher than your average scandal and my ruck straps

• Microwave & dishwasher safe — no subpoenas required, just standard operating procedures

• Large handle for strong grips (or tiny baby hands—hey, not judging your kit)

• Premium white ceramic with rounded corners — like my policies: soft-spoken, iron-willed

Care Instruction:
Rinse and reload: hot water, a quick scrub, and back to the watch floor.