"Full Coverage for the 99%"

This dual-layer phone case is rugged, reliable, and ready for revolution. Featuring Baby Bernie with the intensity of a thousand town halls, it wraps your phone in the kind of protection I wish we had for democracy. Drop-tested? Please — I’ve been dropping truth bombs since the ‘80s.

Whether you’re texting your senator or doomscrolling through late capitalism, this case keeps your device safe and your values visible. Because even your phone deserves universal coverage.

Product Features:

• 3D Wrap for full-coverage designs — just like my scandals

• UV protection, because my image deserves sunlight

• Durable outer shell tougher than my debate prep

• Shock-absorbing silicone liner for emotional support

• Dual-layer construction — built to survive polls, drops, and tantrums

Care Instructions:
Wipe it down like you wipe student debt — quickly and with joy.