“Fixing Streets, One Sticker at a Time”

“Stick me anywhere and I’ll brighten the place up — from your laptop to your water bottle to the back of the bike rack you lock up at the Amtrak station. This glossy kiss-cut sticker is the portable PR tour your belongings have been waiting for.”

“It’s weatherproof, just like my optimism in February Iowa snowstorms, and as easy to apply as it is to casually reference my military service in any conversation. Peel, stick, and let the world know you’re part of Team Baby Mayor.”

Product Features:

• Kiss-cut design for easy peel-and-stick activism

• Weatherproof vinyl, because I don’t melt under pressure

• Glossy finish so bright it outshines my approval ratings

• One size fits all—just like my campaign promises

• Slap it on your laptop, water bottle, or your enemy’s car

Care Instructions:
“Clean the surface like you’d prep for a town hall: smooth, dry, and free of baggage.”